It’s another half year more to go before graduation! Today marks the end of the first semester of Final Year! It’s not all good news when the thought of further education keeps popping up in my head these days and it makes me feel more scared and worried, rather than excited. Maybe I forgot that was how I felt when I was taking my O levels 3 years back.
I’ve talked about going to the next level in a couple of my previous blog posts and I just can’t help not to mention it at all because it’s constantly ringing in my head. But there’s nothing I can do even if I’m worried – because now, I’ll have to wait and work hard, not for long before the verdict’s out. And this time is different because you know it’s the last baton you’re reaching out for in a Relay Race before you go for one more final round and this race ends.
Nah, it’s probably an endless race. The least perkiest moments of your life await you after you finish this ‘education’ race and you start to become like everyone else – “it’s GroundHog Day for you every day!” and the looks on the faces of Office-Goers in the Morning & after-work trains. No wait, maybe I shouldn’t probe about this because nobody feels perked up at all at 8AM in the morning.
Day after day, you wonder where did those days go. You thought you lost those days.
But the routine life isn’t that bad when you come to think of the things do every day that’s contributing back to anyone and anything at all. Like whether it’s the Economy, Technology, Research, someone / animal who needs help. I don’t know if contributing to the Economy makes anyone exceptionally happy, excluding the money makers, but I think it does when it explains the high standard of living we have it here. But back to the point, you feel happy & at worth because your existence justifies for an impact, even a little one.
You haven’t really lost those ‘days’ – maybe losing those days to yourself, but definitely not losing those to other things which you contributed fair share in.
My hopes are just to be able to commit to that sort of thinking – especially when I think about “what am I doing with my life?” in the train when I go to work every Morning.
Meanwhile, during this 2-months vacation, I just hope to get a part-time job to pass time, save up and preferably learn something, x