Daily Prompt post: After spending time with a group of people, do you feel energized and ready for anything or do you want to hide in the corner with a good book?
It really boils down to the people I’m with. I feel certainly pumped up when I’m with familiar people whom I can tell them anything in this world; without feeling cautious or judged.
However, most of the time, social situations just drain me out because it pains me to make constant, reluctant efforts to initiate topics of interest / talk with the other party. It’s not with the other party, it’s just me – because every time I’m with someone; whether or not they’re familiar to me, I subconsciously feel that I’ve got to engage the other party in the conversation.
I wish I was invisible – just to observe how some others do feel as awkward as I am but at the same time, not wanting to get seen by them of how I’m just like any of them.
Eventually, I feel that the energy I’ve had left for the rest of the long day has been sucked out dry.
If I had to choose to spend time with a group of people or to hide in a corner with a good book, I will choose the latter. A good book engages you – from the first page when you start reading, all the way until you flip to the last page. Not just to anyone, a book engages its readers who would be interested to engage themselves with the story. The story is always there, while we choose whether we want to read it. But people don’t. Not all of us do. We change.
We’re not obliged to.
I like to feel engaged in the plot of a good book because I tend to jolly imagine the life I would like to live, just like the characters in the story. Although the characters I read about depict mostly anti-social personae, however, rather quite fearless and intelligently ‘cool’, who would go all the way out to do something – like solving a mystery which is completely unrelated and doesn’t concern them at all (which I don’t understand why, but I still read it because it’s not the sense in the plot which interests me but the characters).
Reading a book doesn’t make me feel stupid because you need not to react or respond to what you read, it engages you and it’s all good. You can’t respond to people the way you read books – especially books which plots involve the sort of personae I described above. And with the fact that I get all flustered and fearful when people spring up an unexpected question or opinion to me, I feel like I don’t actually have an IQ because I’d just go like “errr…” or muted because I always tend to say the wrong things without realizing that.